Comments on: Why one guy is quitting social media and why this is important

By: Chris Catania

Chris Catania — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:49:51 +0000

Great topic!

I'm the kind of person that's very curious about a lot of things, especially things going on in social media. But I can also get overwhelmed really quickly, too. Which sadly takes away from my "cognitive surplus" and "creative energy." And when those are depleted, I've discovered that it takes away from what I can actually bring to the conversations going on in Facebook and Twitter.

I often wonder why someone has followed me for months on twitter but not said anything via @replies or DM. I don't @reply to every follower but when I saw few followers engaging with me, even though I showed a genuine interest in their ideas, I started to have my doubts about the benefits of Twitter as a relationship building tool.

So I started to focus more on having real expectations and focus more on building a manageable community. But building relationships is hard to do in person, let alone via the internet or social media communities. And it's also hard not to get caught up in the social media popularity contest, and think that if you don't have a bazillion followers than you're not doing something right. Which is one of the emotional traps of Twitter.

My goal lately has been to really focus on what I'm passionate about and try to figure out how that can help other people. And hopefully what I bring to the community will change the world for the better in some way. That's something I can manage, which helps me see the benefits of social media more than its flaws.

I'm confident that blogs are still going to be around because they can present a more complete picture of person and their built better for conversation over a period of time, which is key to building meaningful relationships. And I do hope that you keep blogging Jay.

As you can tell, this post really struck a chord. Thanks for sharing Mark!

By: Mark Dykeman

Mark Dykeman — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 15:12:23 +0000

Michael, that's certainly true to the extent of what people reveal about themselves online. You certainly get a better sense of what a person is like with these tools than without, but it's still a limited glimpse.

By: Michael Kozakewich

Michael Kozakewich — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 12:25:26 +0000

I'd say the biggest factor is WHY you use it.
To me, it's a wonderful way to eavesdrop into conversations between people I look up to. I get a better sense of who they are, and where all their interests lie.

By: Is social media actually useful? ¦ Online Media Cultist

Is social media actually useful? ¦ Online Media Cultist — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 05:23:19 +0000

[...] Broadcasting Brain picks up a rather interesting post from Jay Cruz that challenges me to consider Twitter and social media in a light that I haven’t quite done before called Why I’m Quitting Social Media: I realized that at best social media is entertainment disguised as “useful” information or crowdsourced “knowledge”, and at worst is distraction disguised as entertainment. The later being most of my experience with social networking sites, specially Twitter. See, when you watch Television to kill time and distract yourself because you’re bored, it is easier to realize it. Most TV junkies are aware that they are TV junkies. But the web is constantly shifting your attention and it makes it harder to realize that you’re distracting yourself. [...]

By: That sucking sound? Your life and Social Media — Shooting at Bubbles

That sucking sound? Your life and Social Media — Shooting at Bubbles — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 03:48:26 +0000

[...] Mark points out in his post not everyone is happy with the shallowness that people try to sell as the new friendship. I cannot [...]

By: Mark Dykeman

Mark Dykeman — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 09:18:39 +0000

And that's another useful perspective, Zed.

Seriously, I can understand your concern about not having kindred souls to connect with.

By: Mark Dykeman

Mark Dykeman — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 09:17:04 +0000

No worries, thanks for stopping by. Glad to hear the blogging continues!

By: Zed

Zed — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 04:59:31 +0000

You know what? I KNOW I'm a social media addict. I WAY prefer it to being a TV addict. TV decides what I learn, what I watch. (I have a choice of shows, but..once in a show, I'm locked into that show) I like the social interaction. If I'm going to be sitting around, I want to be sitting around interacting with people in real time. I find VERY FEW people here in the deep south that i can connect with. It it weren't for social media, I'd be sitting on the porch with my brother shooting at squirrels. Or I'd be watching cable tv. Or I'd be … well, I guess I'd be doing what I did before I found the internet, drinking myself to death.

By: JayCruz

JayCruz — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 02:45:47 +0000

Thanks for sharing the post around and for offering a really great reaction. I was kind of scared that it was going to turn out too lecture-y. I don't think is something that drastic though. That's another assumption about social media that's overblown. The idea that if you're not on Twitter, Facebook, Friendfeed, you're missing out. I guess the speed, but I find that to be more of a disadvantage. I'm slowing it down like Dr Dre with Dr Pepper.

I'm definitely not planning on quitting the blog however. This can sound hypocritical because blogs are thrown into the social media tag, but the expectation and purpose is clear. I write, you read. Maybe I get comment, maybe I comment back. But I'm definitely out of the following-being-followed thing. And hey, I can always make a blog post of what I had for breakfast.

Thanks again Mark. I always appreciate your thoughts.

By: Mark Dykeman

Mark Dykeman — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 23:31:21 +0000

Could be.