Words are powerful; if you are reading this sentence, you realize that this is true. Words start wars, break hearts, spread joy, educate and inform, and thousands of other things. Many of our societies advocate free speech. I’m generally in favor of unrestricted communication. However, my family has chosen to avoid using a particular word and I’d like to explain why.

The word is hate.

Early in our relationship my wife and I were talking about something and I believe that I said “I hate that.” She took offense to my use of the word “hate”. We talked it over for awhile and we both came to the conclusion that we didn’t want to encourage the concept of hate within our family. Therefore, we made a conscious decision to stop using that word. And, with only a few minor exceptions, we haven’t spoken that word aloud in over ten years.

Is this a kooky thing to do? Good question. We don’t hear the word hate in our house, again except for a couple of exceptions. Does this have any affect on our thoughts or behavior? I’ve only heard the kids use the word once or twice each. Does that mean they don’t get angry? Heck no, they’ve both got tempers, just like their parents! But I’d like to think that maybe it’s having a positive effect on their thinking.

Generally speaking I don’t use the word hate when I write. Probably it’s because I don’t write a lot of emotional posts and I generally don’t go on tirades, either. I guess I’ve modified my own behavior to the point that I won’t willingly use the word hate (this post excepted, I guess). Do I still feel the emotion? Generally not, but I can’t say that it’s completely banished, either.

I’m not writing this to say that by eliminating a word that you banish the subject that it represents.

Maybe, just maybe, though, you can set a positive example that could have a positive impact on other people.

So, I’m curious. What do you think?

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