Here are some sure-fire steps to writing a popular blog post if you’re lazy and have no ideas of your own (I’ve probably used them a few times):

  1. Read the newspaper and write about the front page news
  2. Surf the Web and find out about the day’s news. Write about a story that’s popular.
  3. Check Twitter for interesting stuff, especially stuff that a lot of people are talking about.
  4. Complain about how Digg’s front page sucks these days
  5. Complain about how Digg’s algorithm is still broken
  6. Complain about all of the people who complain that Digg’s algorithm is still broken
  7. Complain about any other bookmarking/news service
  8. Comment on the latest Scobleizer post
  9. Explain why Scoble is the most important blogger ever
  10. Explain why Scoble is losing his influence
  11. Comment on the latest Scoble FriendFeed discussion
  12. Complain about Scoble when he doesn’t give you the “juice” that you deserve!
  13. Write a post explaining why Robert Scoble is just this guy, you know?
  14. Complain about Twitter
  15. Explain how Twitter could be so much better if the following changes were made
  16. Write about the coolest new Twitter app that you’ve discovered
  17. Explain why people don’t read anymore
  18. Explain why people read more than ever
  19. Explain why people actually scan content instead of reading it
  20. Talk about how you or someone you know suffers from ADD
  21. Talk about how everyone’s attention span is shrinking
  22. Complain about (pick one of: Microsoft, Yahoo, Google, Apple)
  23. Praise (pick one of: Microsoft, Yahoo, Google, Apple)
  24. Rant about how the banks make too much money
  25. Complain that taxes are too high
  26. Complain that taxes aren’t high enough and your country is going to go broke
  27. Explain how the economy is going into a recession
  28. Explain how the economy is going to pick up any day now
  29. Explain how the economy is better than ever
  30. Make fun of a well-known politician/celebrity/business leader/religious leader/blogger
  31. Praise a well-known politician/celebrity/business leader/religious leader/blogger
  32. Complain about how all of the good ideas have already been taken
  33. Define social media
  34. Explain why everyone else has the wrong idea of what social media really is, but you’ve got it right - and why
  35. Explain what Web 2.0 is
  36. Explain what Web 2.0 isn’t and why everyone else is wrong
  37. Explain what Web 3.0 will be
  38. Explain what Web 3.0 won’t be and why everyone else is wrong
  39. Explain why Web x.x is a stupid, stupid way to classify Web technology
  40. Take a common noun or verb, add x.x to it, and explain what it really means.
  41. Find an unknown blogger and sing their praises
  42. Crap on the A-list bloggers
  43. Praise the A-list bloggers
  44. Explain why you should really be on the A-list
  45. Explain why you’d never, ever want to be on the A-list
  46. Explain what the A-list really is
  47. Explain how you can make money online
  48. Complain about Google Adsense
  49. Explain how you have a fool proof system to make good money with Google Adsense (but give very few details)
  50. Complain about how Technorati authority is really, really broken
  51. Defend the merits of the Technorati authority doo-hickey
  52. Complain that (insert blogger here) isn’t giving “link juice” like they should be
  53. Complain about how people are bugging you to link to them
  54. Explain how the music industry is doing just swell in the digital era
  55. Show the world how and why the music industry is F&$^^d
  56. Defend Torrents and other file sharing services
  57. Explain how it is so obvious that “free” is the killer business model
  58. Complain about how people should be paying you for your creative work
  59. Complain about spam
  60. Complain about all of the social media “noise” that you have to deal with!
  61. Explain why “noise” and comment dispersion aren’t bad things
  62. Explain why comment dispersion and dispersed conversations will kill your blog
  63. Rail against injustice of some kind
  64. Rail against censorship
  65. Complain that some @ssholes shouldn’t be allowed to blog
  66. Eviscerate someone who’s been talking trash about you or your buds
  67. Tell the world why Wordpress is the best blogging platform
  68. Complain about “echo” in the blogosphere
  69. Complain about websites and companies that enforce the “walled garden” approach
  70. Explain to your readers why it is EXTREMELY important to write your posts in advance
  71. Give advice on creating and launching the perfect meme
  72. Complain about the use of memes and how they are a waste of time
  73. Complain about how you get pitched by too many people and they don’t do it properly
  74. Complain about how professional sports suck all around
  75. Complain about how no one understands (someone or something else other than you)
  76. Complain about how no one listens to you
  77. Explain your fascination with superstition, particularly numbers
  78. Debunk superstition and myths because it’s all dumb
  79. Explain with enthusiasm all of the great blog post ideas that you have
  80. Complain that you don’t have any good ideas for blog posts
  81. Complain that you don’t have enough time to write the good posts that you really want to write
  82. Write a post listing a bunch of different posts that you could write

On second thought, forget it. These all suck, too.

(This moment of questionable humor brought to you by Broadcasting Brain, the blog which thinks it is too clever for its own darn good.)

If you're new here, welcome! Please consider subscribing to my RSS feed to stay up to date with my latest posts and articles. Thanks for visiting!

Other posts that you might enjoy reading:

  • No Related Post