Being a role model might not be much fun

Role models (be they celebrities, bloggers, athletes, musicians, actors, etc.) share at least one important characteristic with the rest of us:  they are human beings.

And I’m not going to make any cheap jokes about the superhuman work and relationship building capabilities of some bloggers.

However, if a celebrity can maintain some form of regular social contact outside of their inner circle, I think everyone can benefit.

Revisiting Role Model 3.0

Yesterday’s post and diagram:

Role Model Evolution

Clearly there’s an implication of progression, if not superiority, if you go from 1.0 to 2.0 to 3.0 (although you could argue that 2.0 might be inferior to the other two models, depending on your judgement criteria.)  If nothing else, wouldn’t most of us tend to think it would be great if we could pick up a phone and get instant access to the star or expert of our choice?

There are times that I would pay for access to an expert.  Many people do, in the form of conferences and training sessions.

There are other times that we seek validation and confirmation of our own worthiness.  A role model can provide that if we believe them to have similar thoughts and feelings on a topic.

Fortunately, some individuals are charitable (or smart) enough to give their time, energy, and knowledge to help benefit other people.

But there is a cost.

Put yourself in their shoes

We have limited time to do what we want to do in this life.  That’s why websites like Lifehacker, 43 Folders, Dumb Little Man, Zen Habits, and many others are popular: 

  • get more done in the time in you have
  • feel better about what you can do in the time that you have

Here are some scenarios to consider:

  • If you’re a professional, you have huge demands on your time (been there, doing that.)
  • If you have a family, you have huge demands on your time (as a parent and husband, I can vouch for this.)
  • If you are involved in charitable or volunteer work, you have huge demands on your time (ditto.)
  • If you do creative work or anything else with your “free time”:  you have to make some decisions about how to prioritize your activities.

Looking at it from that perspective, there are some difficult choices to consider if a role model is going to attempt to have a balanced life.

Gimmee, gimmee, gimmee

I had some interesting feedback from a couple of people who are A-list bloggers, or damned close to it.  This person One of them made the valid point that they are frequently asked to do things for other people.  In fact, some people DEMAND help, normally for free.

We do expect great things from our role models, don’t we?

Put yourself in the same situation and ask yourself how you would honestly react.  Think twice and be sure you’re really being honest with yourself.  Think about the time and energy that you would have to give up in that position.

Sarah from ReadWriteWeb argues that real people don’t have time for social media.  Actually, what she says is that there’s a tricky challenge for people who devote lots of time to social media, because it’s a zero-sum game:  time spent in social media is taken from time spent on other things.

That rule holds true for everyone.

Future considerations

My role model chart isn’t perfect and I can see a number of areas for improvement, so I’m thankful for the feedback that I’ve received to date.

The thinking that led to today’s post has been a worthwhile exercise for me.  It also makes me think that works like Cluetrain Manifesto need to be read very carefully and considered in full, no matter how intuitive or cool that they sound.  Conversational marketing, including the use of social media, has huge potential but could have heavy, heavy costs for anyone who goes down that road.

It’s all a matter of time.

P.S. (Added 1:10 PM Atlantic Standard Time)

Getting back to my original point:  if a role model/expert/influencer/connector can make time to interact outside of their normal sphere, I really do believe it’s beneficial.

Jeff Quipp talks about authority, spheres of influence, and influence ripples in a recent blog post.  His comments about the prices and consquences of obtaining “rock star” (read “role model”) status are similar to mine, if not explained better and more concisely.

I think it’s to the Role Model’s advantage to have access to new and different ideas.  Things change.  The world is a little bit different anyday.  Your immediate posse is not omnisicient and neither are you (or me, for that matter.)  New ideas, new insights, and challenges to the status quo are occasionally necessary to prevent stagnation.

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10 Comments

  1. Colin Walker » What makes a good social media role model?:

    [...] on from his previous post Mark Dykeman takes a look from a contrary point of view and says that being a Role Model 3.0 may not be such a [...]

  2. Allen Harkleroad:

    Nice article Mark.

  3. Rob Diana:

    Sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for. Celebrity (even the internet kind) may not be what you really want.

    (yes, this was to help with the commentluv test).

    Check out Twitter and FriendFeed: Information Overload from Rob Diana

  4. brainadmin:

    @Allen @Rob – thanks guys!

  5. Laura Callow:

    Great article Mark. I think that you’ve hit the nail on the head. Time is of the essence, and maintaining balance is crucial. It’s imortant imo for parents always to remember that first and foremost they are the ultimate role models to their little ones in their formative years – that responsibily comes first.

    Check out WestJet, our new transportation partner from Laura Callow

  6. brainadmin:

    @Laura – thanks. The responsibility of being a parent is pretty huge and easy to overlook.

  7. honest ape:

    This CommentLuv plugin is the shit. Awesome!

  8. brainadmin:

    @honest ape – it doesn’t seem to have worked right for you…

  9. Mobile P?:

    I can’t agree that real people don’t have time for social media.

  10. What makes a good social media role model? » Walker Media:

    [...] on from his previous post Mark Dykeman takes a look from a contrary point of view and says that being a Role Model 3.0 may not be such a [...]

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